ON PLEASURE, SENSUALITY AND LIVING BY DESIRE
Why not Build a Life based on Desire rather than fear and concern?
Fear is often based in desiring - but thinking, feeling, believing you can't get it or do it – whatever "it" is -------
The Realm of Pleasure and Sensuality is highly charged. Within this arena resides that which motivates and controls us all, whether positive or negative.
If one can be "free" here, all the rest of life is much easier. So, be willing to go where it is "hottest" or "coldest" to find what is true for you.
Find a "turned-on" woman and build a house around her – why not?
Live out your desires – they are placed in your body as part of your purpose in being alive.
What everyone really wants:
If you quit "going for it all" you won't get it.
Never forget to be gracious and grateful –
especially in the man-woman dynamic.
The "sexual suppression" culture IS the Matrix. Know that "the matrix" is there, but don't let it control your movement to pleasure, and in the simple matter of showing approval of a woman in various ways.
In every moment, you choose the judgment you have about what is happening. You can be in agreement with what is happening or not. Your choice is to win or lose the pleasure that is inherently there.
If you surrender to desires, you are not controlled by them. Desire does not produce suffering. It is ATTACHMENT to desires that does so.
What you resist, will persist.
Mastery requires diligence. What are you waiting for? When is "someday" for you?
Confidence is being willing to "move" anyway in the face of fear. Be bold anyway. Fake it if necessary. Most of the time, only you will think you are actually faking it.
Jealousy is one of the most difficult feelings to move positively and confidently in the face of. Jealousy is intense energy that hits your "scarcity" button, and activates all the ways you feel inadequate and inferior to others.
Instead of collapsing, use this energy to go for what you desire.
Two elements of fostering and nurturing an intimate relationship.
Tell the truth completely with no withholding The end of a relationship starts with one withhold. Withholds are just as often positive as well as negative.
Be approving to each other. For women, massive approval for what a man is offering or giving to you. "Yes" must be prior to a request for more or a change of action
If one person in a relationship is open and surrendered, the other has no choice but to do likewise. For men especially - Stop looking for a surrendered woman. And start being open and surrendered yourself.
Men cannot win unless the woman is winning ("If momma ain't happy, ain't no one happy")
Men must see their woman as a complete human being, and treat them like one.
A man or a woman will never do anything to hurt the one they surrender to.
When mono-amory is full, then poly-amory comes naturally from the overflow.
The optimal way of deepening intimacy, pleasure and trust is "doing".
In "doing", one person takes the roll of "cause" and the other takes the roll of "effect". Then the "cause" and the "effect" both put their complete attention on maximizing the pleasure of the one at "effect".
Both men and women can become very skilled at "doing" another. It primarily requires the willingness to put complete attention on the other, and having the desire to give that other great pleasure. Then the skills necessary to do so can be developed easily, if one is willing to be guided and to learn from an experienced teacher. Why would anyone not want to?